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| stress |
| 11.30.04 (10:38 am) [edit] |
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Phew! I was up until 5:30 this morning (surprisingly wired) mostly because I was skimming a book I wanted to use in the paper that I bought and waited for so I was sure as hell going to quote it at least once, finishink my paper on Mooose and Squirrel. I did my oral presentation today, so that's all done. Today, I have to do part one of my last Biology assignment. (There's some other minor things I have to do in there too, sketches, study government). Then I have to paint paddle (I imagine that will be an all-day Fridayesque activity). Least after this weekend I won't have to worry about fratority crap anymore after this. Shit, I have to buy a corsage one of these days, dammit! Then all I will have to really worry about aside from finals is deciding whether I am going to do a Biology extra credit and my final life drawing project. Almost done! 25 days! (Even if Jeremy was being a jerk to me last night). BACK TO WORK, MAGGOT!! Current Mood:  slightly stressed
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| 2 Comments |
| Doormat |
| 11.29.04 (9:27 pm) [edit] |
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Often, I feel like a doormat. Other times, if I decide for once to stand up for mydamnself, I am told I, "take things too seriously." More later. Wish it were about a week or 2 later than it actually is. Current Mood: disgruntled, but not in that postal-worker kind of way. |
| 2 Comments |
| some good, most irritating |
| 11.22.04 (11:35 am) [edit] |
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Well, my dad cancelled lunch with me, after I spent my day not paying attention in class doing art homework. And he doesn't even get his ass out until...he was supposed to be here at 12:30 so we could have lunch. :x Now I am wondering if I should eat something, knowing that since this is the day of my night class I may not get to later. But food sometimes makes me feel guilty, especially when I don't go to the gym like I know I need to. So I'll see if I can resist the urges for rest of the day. Probably not. I'm so mentally weak! I don't want to end up looking like my mom. I don't want to even end up looking like I did almost 4 years ago.:? I got a counseling session with the counselor i had at the beginning of the year on Wednesday morning!:) And now I am using my free 3 hours to study for my fratority. evil: I did not sign up for this shit. Why am I bothering? Why do I care? What are they going to do? Kick me out if I don't memorize their pointless gibberish? Would they at least return my check? Why do I stay with things that are hard or frustrating or challenging? It would be so much easier to quit the things I am doing, so why don't I?:? Current Mood:  conflicted
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| 1 Comments |
| stuff sucks |
| 11.19.04 (1:50 pm) [edit] |
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Time to do one or more of 4 things. 1. Get dressed, go to the library, get some books and go to Robert's for a paddle (I don't pretend to understand why). 2. Buy something and pretend it's going to make everything that sucks better. 3. Do the best I can right now to fix these problems. 4. Follow the wise advice of my TV Production teacher and Don't Get Discouraged 1. I am dressed. I went to Robert's and got the damn paddle. I was tempted to start weilding it. Don't think I am going to make it to the library today. BTW, I hate Robert's now too. 2. I think my adventure will start at Valley Fair. I need to do something impetuous (not that Valley Fair is exactly living on the edge); buy a pair of cute underwear, eat a fatass ice cream sundae, go to a movie, all of the above. 3. I did the best I could for right now and it still didn't do a damn bit of good. Fucking GE. Now I have to do the thing where I beg for mercy from the teachers. This time it looks like I may have to do some hard core begging. 4. Much easier said than done. Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you stronger I am going to be a mountain by the time I am done with this process. Here is the quote I feel best describes my life (again): "Pleasure comes in small doses; it's a cigarette, a chocolate chip cookie, a five second orgasm. You come, you eat the cookie, you smoke the butt, you go to sleep, you get up, you go to fucking work. End of story okay!!!" How did it end up being 4:00? This is not how I intended my day. 11:00, register for classes. 11:30/12, check out library books. Time to buy something fatening/pretty/alcoholic /frivolous or some combination of the 4. Current Mood:  blaaaaaaaah...
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| 0 Comments |
| I'm a naive idiot! |
| 11.19.04 (10:23 am) [edit] |
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And this is what I get for being optimistic that maybe for once things will go right during a registration process or some other issue. I don't know whether to cry or scream. I feel like an small furry animal that gets kicked around keeps coming back for more abuse because it hopes every time will be different. This is what I get for hoping... This is what I get for daring to be optimistic. And I even tried to do something about it this time! But the fates are against me that I should actually progress, even just a little bit in this school. I feel like I am running in place. I hate my life! I hate this school! I hate my current circumstances! I wish I could fast forward through the next 3 years of my life. This is another one of those times when those Cliff's Notes would come in handy... Tonight would be a good night to go to the gym, I think. Oh, wait. They close at 5fuckingpm! Time to do one or more of 4 things. 1. Get dressed, go to the library, get some books and go to Robert's for a paddle (I don't pretend to understand why). 2. Buy something and pretend it's going to make everything that sucks better. 3. Do the best I can right now to fix these problems. 4. Follow the wise advice of my TV Production teacher and Don't Get Discouraged Current Mood:    Angry, physically uncomfortable, and depressed
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| 0 Comments |
| scheduling today! |
| 11.19.04 (7:30 am) [edit] |
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1.5 hours until I can schedule for next semester! I haven't been this hopeful and worried since Election Day. Let's hope this isn't as disappointing. I wish I could have a class on Tuesday and Thursday mornings, instead of one class at noon. Almost every other class I could need for RTVF conflicts with an all-important art class. Well, after this semester I will only have 5 of those classes and an internship at some point to be through with that. Current Mood:  trying to be patientWhat's On: Ballroom Blitz - Sweet |
| 0 Comments |
| schedule |
| 11.18.04 (10:09 pm) [edit] |
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I think I figured out what classes I need for next semester, including 3 art classes, one of them on Friday morning, dammit. Oh well. It was bound to happen again sooner or later. I think I may finally be at a point in this process where I actually have some priority over other people. That is, everyone I have spoken to is scheduled after me. I It's been a week where I feel like I am constantly moving with video projects or getting to Parkview an hour before I usually come. Plus there was a fire alarm at 1:4fucking5 this morning because people evidentally only practice fire safety when people are lucid! But it's OK, because now I have a big ol' frosty Corona 24 oz'er in my fridge! Tomorrow I schedule and start my paper on how Rocky and Bullwinkle historically reflects Cold War paranoias. Now tho, time for bed. Current Mood: le's face id, i'm tiehd!
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| 0 Comments |
| Disney World = Happiness? |
| 11.17.04 (6:17 pm) [edit] |
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Today as I walked around thinking about how crappy my life is, considering going back into counseling, missing my boyfriend, cursing biology lab, the fact that I have to do art class at 2 tomorrow instead of 3, thinking about joining an eating disorders group, hoping to have all the shit memorized for my fratority next Tuesday, the questions I want to ask Mr. PDI Storyboard on Saturday should i be able to obtain the funds, assuring myself it was just as well they were out of good pizza, and pondering a potentially useless Radio TV Film degree... something occured to me. In Disney World, I never thought about how crappy life is. The work was crappy, and all the crap that made it crappy (the manual labor, late breaks, stupid guestomers, long hours, and horrendous costume) was crappy. But it was probably one of the only extended periods of time in my life where I was truly happy. I never worried much about my weight. I never felt guilty about not going to the gym (which I never did!), I I miss that lack of stress and general ease everything seemed to have back then. Current Mood  N/A
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| 1 Comments |
| Cliff's Notes |
| 11.16.04 (6:22 pm) [edit] |
Today has been one of those days where I wish that I could have a copy of the Cliff's Notes to my life so that I could read the short version of what happens before it actually does. Maybe I'm just tired... Tired from finally finishing my video project and running around like a chicken with my head cut off. (It went well, even if like most of my artistic endeavors it was just a bit disappointing). Wondering if my college experience is a waste (and not just the general ed, because I know that is a waste unless I happen to be on Jeopardy or playing Trivial Pursuit). At least I have my weekly This Modern World Fix to look forward to. (Hee hee! It's very funny this week!) Good Advice from a teacher today Don't get discouraged. He sighted the example of a student rejected from SJSU's animation program now working on The Simpsons Speaking of which, a quote from the aforementioned program that seems somewhat applicable to my latest thoughts. Stupid risks are what make life worth living. Risk in its very definition repeats the same words hazard and loss. It would be stupid to put oneself in one or both of these positions, right? Therefore the majority of "risk"s are crazy, if not downright stupid at their core. But to only play it safe means to lead a bland existence. While meant to be laughable, there seems to be some genuine wisdom here. Current Mood: mmmmmmmnnnnnnh
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| 0 Comments |
| figured stuff out |
| 11.15.04 (10:46 am) [edit] |
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I figured out why I obsess about the future. It's because of school. In high school, their primary concern is graduating and college. Everything is about looking good on that college application. Then in college, most of the classes in your major require prerequisites. So you have to think about what classes you are going to take to get to the classes you need. Everything in college is future oriented. The present is important, but only as it relates to the future be it graduation, grad school, or a career. I figured out why I don't trust myself. Because my parents don't. They have announced they won't support me getting married before I finish college (which is ashame, but if they won't they won't, c'est le vie). The reason is because, according to my mom, they don't believe I would be inclined to finish school without a degree. (Which is bullshit, only because I have/am work(ed/ing) to fucking hard to not). But they don't trust that I will do it. Which I find sad. Unfortunately, I didn't get the chance to express to my father my disappointment in his great lack of faith in me this weekend. It's a little challenging when he's around those 2 goobs (they're nice usually, just challenging to talk to my dad seriously). Incidentally, I am tired of people pushing me to do things the way they think they ought to be done. And I'm not just talking about my parents. Current Mood:  Resisting urges
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| 2 Comments |
| I don't feel so good... |
| 11.14.04 (7:38 pm) [edit] |
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I've suddenly started feeling nauseous. I wonder why... Current Mood:  Sick to my stomach
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| 1 Comments |
| My weekend |
| 11.14.04 (11:31 am) [edit] |
 After feeling like I had accomplished nothing on Friday, I met my uncle Tim for lunch at the Mission Ale House. It was a lot of fun. He was kind of intimidating when I was a little kid. But that was before he kind of mellowed out and "I became interesting" as my mother put it (to him anyway). We talked about music, movies, it was fun. Plus by 3:00 in the afternoon, I had a buzz.  That evening, Andrea and I went to see the school's production of As You Like It. My favorite Shakespeare play. This one was set in a period insane assylum. I picked this picture because it has a friend of mine, in the long robe with the bitch on a leash, playing Duke Ferdinand. Then Andrea and I went to Britania Arms, had a drink, and we watched Mean Girls. It looked funny in class. I was disappointed with that...and Saved which I watched earlier that day.  The next morning, whilst everyone living with an Y chromosome was at the Spartan football game, my mom and I went to Ikea. I showed her all the furnature I wanted to have in my navy blue and lime green-decorated house someday. We bought the chair above to temporarily replace the breaking one in my room. (I could tell someone, but they would charge me for it, despite that it's probably as old as the building itself and that just happens sometimes...) Then I got new jeans and new shoes. Then I stole the chair out of my room and replaced it with that one. I showed my commercial for The 12 Pack to everyone at my Grandma's, my dad's best friend and brother-in-law, wife and son. They all liked it, thought Kelly's drunken stagger was very convincing. While Jeremy's dry county and more-or-less state situation is interesting, it's more interesting to explain it to other people, to have to repeatedly say, "No there are no liquor stores, no beer in the groceries..." And to just hear/see their appalled reactions. I drank some last night. I never got buzzed. Kind of a waste of beer in that respect. This morning I had brunch at Marie Callendar's. It was very tasty. Now I need to do something else Current Mood:  fine
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| 2 Comments |
| Tiny people |
| 11.12.04 (3:02 pm) [edit] |
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Some people are so When you listen to them talk, you know they are small people. And you want to smack them when they piss and moan. I miss Jeremy! Current Mood: figure it out! What's On: Saved |
| 1 Comments |
| One of those days... |
| 11.12.04 (10:56 am) [edit] |
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Today has been one of those days where I can't seem to do anything even though I am doing a lot. Rather than yielding to the temptation of going back to bed this morning, I made myself get up to go see an adivisor. When I got to the office, a sign said she would not be in. I went to the career center to look into getting an internship. I was given a booklet on resumes and papers about their website. I walked to student services to ask about the possibility of at least getting a Radio/TV/Film BA, while waiting on art. I was told that if I was officially a double major, I had to do it all at once.:? As I was walking away, I remembered that the purpose of student services is not to serve students, but rather to give them a quick answer no matter how satisfying/truthful/vague . You will never hear someone say in student services, "however..." As in "if you are officially a double major, you can't do that however if you are not officially than you can/still can't." It's strange too, they jump on one word, even if it's not exactly the most correct word, (because you don't live in those little heads of theirs) and they jump all over that, and don't say, however... For example, when I wanted to do summer school at Sac State. I called them and when I asked "how do I apply for summer school" I was told, "You don't apply for summer, you only apply for fall/spring." She could have said, "however, if you are already attending another CSU, all you have to do is..." because that would require effort, and they might get a guilty conscious about the fact that they might have actually been benificial to someone. Then I took some pictures of the tower for my paddle (I don't fully understand the whole paddle thing...I don't fully understand the whole fratority thing). Then I fixed my video project. Now I am going to Mission Ale House to see my uncle that I haven't seen since he got married. Current Mood:  the negative balances the positive to make "meh"
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| 1 Comments |
| Empowerment |
| 11.11.04 (7:16 am) [edit] |
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Talking to my aunt and my boyfriend this morning made me feel so much better. This morning's rant has been cancelled. Sorry! Current Mood:  better
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| 1 Comments |
| Horrible fantasies |
| 11.10.04 (7:51 pm) [edit] |
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I had this horrible fantasy where I was in college forever and forever, and I just kept taking classes every semester, anywhere between 5 and 7 of them. Some of them more useless than others. And I just kept taking them, and taking them, and taking them, semester after semester, 5-7 at a time, and I never got any closer to graduation... oh wait... anyway... Then I had this other nightmare that I had a boyfriend living 7 states and 1860 miles away, and it seemed every year he promised that we would be together after every spring semester and then shit came up every time so it kept not happening... oh wait... So in conclusion, just when I think things are going to get better, somebody pulls the carpet out from underneath me. Somehow I don't think this headache is going away for a long, long time. Current Mood:   sad, frustrated, tired, nervous
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| 1 Comments |
| College |
| 11.10.04 (10:21 am) [edit] |
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I have been contemplating how going to college has been a seemingly bad descision. Then I realized it wasn't a descision I was allowed to make. (Not that it matters now but) the type of school I could go to, was not a descision I got to make. Current Mood:  Generally dissatisfied
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| 1 Comments |
| dissatisfaction |
| 11.09.04 (8:26 pm) [edit] |
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Something seems empty to me. But I can't quite figure out what. Any ideas? Current Mood:  wondering
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| 0 Comments |
| headache |
| 11.09.04 (2:23 pm) [edit] |
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I woke up this morning to Machine Gun Kelley (or more accurately, Jack Hammer Jimmy) bright and f'early at 8:00 this morning. My head has been aching ever since. But hey! He didn't finish his job, so I can look forward to it tomorrow too! To add to my headache, I get to go to my fratority meeting in about an hour. I get to be excluded from the meetings, and then I get to be quizzed on all the stupid shit they are making me memorize, and I get to go outside and yell at a building. Oh joy, oh joy. I'll just sleep here until it's time to graduate. Current Mood:Current Mood: blaaaaah
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| 0 Comments |
| flat stomach |
| 11.07.04 (10:59 am) [edit] |
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I wish I had a flat stomach. I would settle for a flatter stomach. Well, wishing won't make it so. Better go to the gym. Current Mood:  disgustedWhat's On: Magic Bus - The Who |
| 8 Comments |
| Fire and beer |
| 11.06.04 (10:11 pm) [edit] |
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Tonight at 11ish there was a fire alarm. Provided that I'm lucid, (which I wasn't the last time at 4:30 in the morning), I remember to bring my wallet, and I go to 7-11 and get a Corona 24-ozer. It's a little tradition of mine. Tonight is no exception. I'm not the only one with this idea either. Current Mood: Attempting to reach a minor buzzWhat's on: The Making of Psycho |
| 0 Comments |
| San Francisco |
| 11.06.04 (5:45 pm) [edit] |
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I can't believe it's only 6:30! I could fall asleep right now. But I won't. Got up, drove to San Francisco, parked by Haight/Ashbury in the parking lot at Stanyan. Got on my bike and went through Golden Gate Park, first on JFK Street; Conservatory, rose garden, (smelled heavenly), Golf Course, buffalo, and windmill; which isn't as pretty in November as it is in, say, April).  I love the conservatory of flowers. It's always pretty. In perfect Amandaland...nevermind...  I came out on Great Highway by the beach. I managed this time, unlike last time I did Golden Gate Park, to ride up the hill to the Cliff House which is somewhat of an accomplishment for me. One thing I did learn from this ride is that the 1-1.5 hr thing, while great for burning calories, is not very helpful in getting up hills. So I have decided that even if I don't go to the gym and do the long time thing, I need to at least go for 15 minutes and set it on a challenging level and do weight lifting.  I came back on MLK, (Botanical Gardens, Japanese Tea Gardens, the blocked off Academy of Sciences). I dismounted and walked around the Botanical Gardens, then walked across the street to the Tea Gardens. I saw a couple in wedding attire getting their pictures taken by the Half Moon Bridge. Then I went to the Haight, walked around there a little bit. Got my sunglasses replaced (finally!). Except these have blue lenses that I am not crazy about. I still have the frames for my old ones. I wonder if there is a way to get the black lenses out of there and replace the blue ones that I got? While saundering through the street, Jeremy called. He told me he had gotten my package. It was an ear piece that could be stuck into a cell phone, as he often bitches about having to hold a phone when he talks to me. He told me he got it, but it wouldn't work with his phone. The reason I was under the impression it would, having never seen his new phone was based on the (mis)information, "It's like your mom's phone." And I can't really outright ask him what kind of a phone he has without tipping my hand. So now I am frustrated. I'm not exactly sure why. It's either because I am mad at myself becasue I feel like I screwed up, or because I can't do something nice and have it be appreciated because it is just innaccurate.:( Getting lost in SF in the past helped prevent me from feeling lost this time because I could think, "This happened last time, and I remember how to fix it." I went to Ghirardelli, and parked near Land's End (not Fort Mason, unfortunately, my favorite place in San Francisco). From the grass in front of Ghirardelli, I called Hooters and ordered a quesidilla to go. Went to the chocolate place, got one of their cookies that are the size of a fast food hamburger. Then walked to Hooters and picked up my quesidilla, which I ate when I got back to my car. Then I drove home, went to Blockbuster, forgot that I wanted to rent Saved and Mean Girls (which from the clip I saw on Thursday in TV Crit, it looks funny), and instead rented Willow and Psycho neither of which I have seen before. Current Mood: exhausted
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| 0 Comments |
| Stupid People and School |
| 11.05.04 (6:12 pm) [edit] |
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First off, I'm sick of stupid people. Secondly, evidentally the new schedule of classes is online. For some reason the very thought of it makes me sick to my stomach. Perhaps it's because I feel like I am running in place; I am not really progressing. I'm never getting out of this place. Or maybe it's because it seems I consistently have trouble getting into art classes. Graduation is an impossible distant dream. But that seems to be the story of my life right now. (Hence the journal's title). I had a very unfun conversation with my dad when we went out for lunch on Wednesday. It consisted mostly of him making pointing out how masochistic I was for even considering getting a BFA, how I am going to graduate with (according to his math) 170 units, and how he managed to get his MA with only an additional semester than it's going to take me to get a BFA. I don't fucking need that! I know already! Well, I got a lot of very important work done today for my video project. Tomorrow, San Francisco bike ride and finally replacing my sunglasses!! Current Mood: blaaaaaah
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| 2 Comments |
| nobody is going to read this |
| 11.04.04 (10:12 pm) [edit] |
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I could whine some more. But I won't say anything more about how 58 million people don't read, or "Politicians and diapers need to be changed, often for the same reason" or the bumpersticker that made me laugh out loud that said Thank you for not paying attention, or how the big headline on the Merc was a quote with a big-ass picture of our Little Bush saying, The American People Have Spoken or something that, and there were several ways I wanted to correct that, how LBJ realized there was no way in hell after delving deeper into Vietnam that he would get reelected and refused to run for reelection yet here we are, or anything about another 4 years of the Usual Gang of Idiots. But I won't. There are 2 things I will say before moving on: 1. All that is left is hope. Hope that four horsemen are not mounting up somewhere, as I suspect they might be. And hope that people eventually become disenchanted with the 2. We'll get it right eventually. The left will rise again!!! OK, I feel a whole lot better. Other things now... I have resolved that I am going to start being more vocal, for both good and bad. I am going to express more often when I am pleased or displeased with what others are doing that I for whatever reason have/get to deal with. This started today. I needed some wood for my film project (which reminds me, NTS: tape the receipt on the page with all the others). I went to the Home Depot by Parkview, tried to get 3/4" (wide, not long) pieces cut, and the guy told me if he cut the thin pieces with a radial arm saw (thank you, set building), "they would explode everywhere" and I would have to do it myself. I have had this exact procedure done multiple times and have yet to see wood "explode." So I left in a huff (they didn't have all the pieces I wanted anyway). Went to another Home Depot and the guy there was really nice and did the cuts I needed, and miraculously, the same wood I wanted at the first place didn't "explode." I wrote a note to the manager about him. Unfortunately, I failed to do so at the other store. Sorta wish I had. But I thought the fact that they weren't getting my $ was punnishment enough. Should've gone to the gym tonight. Would've gone if it wasn't so uncomfortable lately. I wonder why all of a sudden I can't sit on an exercise bike for more than an hour for the simple reason that my ass starts to kill me I have been lately pondering the reason why it is that on a global scale women are treated unequally to men, just as a seemingly general rule. I want to understand why that is exactly. This question becomes even more puzzling considering a video we watched in my biology class (which is a waste of my time and tuition, and most importantly, I don't care about the information; the only truly useful thing I have learned is how to avoid a hangover after a night of binging). The video was about sex, (this week, I have learned so many dirty words like epididymus, fimbria, vas diffrens, and mons pubis). It stated that in most areas of the animal kingdom, given that male sperm is so...readily available, unlike a female's egg, males are the ones jockeying for female's attention and being submissive and attempting to prove themselves as having strong genes to pass on. Therefore, women are the ones who get to be picky; it's a buyer's market so to speak. So why is it that in the human world, men historically, if not currently, subdue women? Why is it the human world back asswards like this? Of course, the human world is bass ackwards anyway. Hee hee! Political Science is funny...and sadly timely. There needs to be a new Strong Bad E-mail soon. I think often of my TV project lately. I keep coming up with very desparate ways that I could hang some paintings in/on a set piece and have them be readily removable. Plus the picture from my project doesn't want to stay on the memory stick that I tranfer it too. Good thing the 12-pack, fully clad in the wrapper I made for it is still clanking around in the back of my car, since that is what it is resorting to since the Mac's are stupid. There is a great imbalance of boys in the TV Production class. And all of the boys' projects have only one of 3 or 4 other boys, in the projects. They all seem to be the same; an overload of testosterone each character jokeying to be funny, usually through a lack of intellect, where the characters are so stupid they can't answer simple questions. One girl wrote a script for a show that was teaching Spanish, and they guy starring in it did it straight the first time. Then the next time he made his own shit up and went in a completely opposite direction. It was funny, but to the point of typicality. I'm glad it wasn't my script. I am happy to say that my show stars entirely females, who think what I wrote is funny, the humor is more in verbalness and less in moronic personalities. The characters are such that they seem straight but are minorly moronic in personalities. And I believe at this point, my show will be the most destructive and physical; no one else has done anything near to breaking a painting or other prop over someone's head yet. Speaking of characters jokeying to be funny, an overload of testosterone, and lack of intellect, I feel like I have been verbally pulled through a ringer tonight. I'm going to bed. I have decided Saturday will be the day I go to San Francisco and (finally) replace my sunglasses. Current mood: mmmmnnnnnnnnhhhhWhat's On: Who Made Who - AC/DC |
| 1 Comments |
| Kerry Concedes |
| 11.03.04 (7:25 am) [edit] |
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NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Well, that's it. It's truly over. It's a gray, gray day out there. I reiterate, who would have thought there would be so many people out there with their craniums wedged solidly in their rectums? Why do I have the feeling we have totally and utterly fucked ourselves over... because we have Current Mood: Deeply saddened
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| 0 Comments |
| Disney World Memories |
| 11.02.04 (10:35 pm) [edit] |
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For reasons I won't go into, I was trying to figure out where exactly the AAA was on Disney World property. I opened my map software and managed to get it to plot the route I would usually follow out of the Magic Kingdom Cast parking, on that dark road around the Grand Floridian, past the Polynesian and the MK's car gates, etc. Thinking about all the time I spent Magic Kingdom alone on Saturday nights waiting for Jeremy to get off work just hanging out riding Haunted Mansion, or that one time I was the only one on the Pirates of the Caribbean, and getting to drive around back there, and go to Property Control (I wore a shirt I got from PC today), not having to worry about schoolwork, getting to dress like a slut for Pleasure Island (even if I couldn't drink) living in a real apartment where I could cook, and most of the people were fun to be with, and my boyfriend was around all the time made me miss it just a little bit. Thinking about it made me a little sad that I most likely am not going to get the privledge of going to a Disney park at any/every possible chance, or do all that other stuff again. I must keep my perspective; a year ago at this time I was excited because we had now just started closing at 7 instead of 7:30. Stupid Soaps Weekend is coming up in 2 weeks. Degreasing the floor of Turkey Legs wasn't so fun. Jeremy and I actually have talked some about going back, but I don't think realistically it's going to work out. Besides, there would have to be a lot of provisions to going back even if I did. #1. Ride operations only... It was a year ago that my family came. Current Mood:  Nostalgic
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| 2 Comments |
| Scared |
| 11.02.04 (8:18 pm) [edit] |
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I would stay at the gym longer than I do/did tonight (a puny 68 minutes) but my ass starts to hurt on those exercise bike seats. I'm frightened. The prospect of another 4 years of Bush truly scares the living shit out of me right now. The fact that Bush as of this second is leading is truly scary. It's like, "Do you people truly not read?!" Jeremy and I talked after I got back to the gym. Our conversation consisted mostly of tense silience as he occassionally relayed what the TV said to him. While at this point it is hard to look at a plus side, the CA Stem Cell Research bill passed! Current Mood:  Nervous
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