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Is it Chrismas yet?
10.17.04 (7:18 pm)   [edit]
I cried last night. I miss him so much sometimes. Contrary to popular belief, it is not because I need to see a counselor or because I have nothing better to do than sulk, Jeremy! It's the physical contact I miss the most, I think.

Incidentally, does one really need a reason to cry more valid than, "I miss you"? Sometimes it seems like it does. "Why are you crying?" "I miss Jeremy." "Is that all? I thought there was a problem!"

So after I talked to him, sobbing, I went to Denny's, ate a Grand Slam, went home, watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, which I enjoyed; I liked the DVD's bonus materials on the special effects and the set; it's such an interesting concept.

I talked to my dad. He sounded interested in the possibility of seeing Alice for Halloween, as does Kelly (thankfully), and he didn't try to bend the world to power by attempting to make me feel stupid and acting like a jerk when I purposed Castro for Halloween (thank god one of them isn't an over emotional moron).

Talked to Jeremy again.

Went to Kelly's film my PSA against running out of beer (an important issue facing many people). She wanted to reschedule because she was feeling like crap. I went over to her house feeling guilty that I was making her do this project with me while she had the flu or something. I found out she was hung over...I had no sympathy compassion for her.

Her boyfriend came out of her bedroom and left before I started shooting. I managed to hide my seething jealousy; the fact that she has cool parents who don't care if they sleep in the same bed together (unlike my dad, just further evidence, it's time to let them go), and the fact that she has a boyfriend in the same area code as she does who she can hang out with and date and get drunk with, and hold...

Yeah...well...my boyfriend is cuter!
Wow, that seems so lame!

Even in Santa Cruz, Ann Coulter's books, including her most recent How to Talk to a Liberal...if You Must are proudly displayed at the front of the store. I kinda want to read that to see what the woman who thinks carpet-bombing the Arab world, and converting them to Christians thinks she should talk to me. See how long I can read it before dissonance sets in.

I need to get on my self-portrait one of these days.

68 days till Christmas!! We're past the halfway point. I don't know if I've ever been this anxious for Christmas to come.

Current Mood: blah
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